Rock most address

Karen Davis Camp Rockmont for Boys 375 Lake Eden Rd.  Black Mountain, NC 28711 O: (828) 686-3885

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Trey Walters 

p) 704-363-6930

You know your a desperate dad when...

You use milk out of the kids' leftover milk cups in the fridge to make a late night bowl of cereal.

First (real) Haircut...

Other than a trip to a mickey's funhouse style haircut place for kids, this is his first true haircut, and at none other than Cotswold Barber Shop - where he became the 5th generation Walters to get his haircut there.

Wasn't too sure about how this one was going to go (the first time he stared at a video while in my arms the whole time), but this time he just sat there holding my hand, staring ahead, and then started to seem to like it, especially the brush off and air blower.

Should have known he'd take to the karma of that place, it's in his blood...fun to do it on Fathers Day weekend, and have three of the generations in attendance.

How far she's come...Cate now poops in the pottie!

Breaking news at the Walters, the little girl that used to poop uncontrollably is now not only going #2 on the little toilet we just got, but she also will alert us when she needs to go by patting herself on the backside and saying, "poop, poop". At first when she did this we thought it was because she had one back there waiting on us (and usually that was the case), but now it literally means, "hey, I got to go, so remove my pants and diaper and open that baby gate immediately so I can get to the bathroom...or else you know what's coming next."

We first realized she was more than ready for some early pottie training when one Sunday several weeks back I got home from a race weekend to discover that Catherine had purchased a little kids toilet. At the time I just laughed to myself, thinking "good luck", it will be another 4-5 months before this thing even gets considered (and it still might be for Logan). But Catherine wanted it there just for them to get familiar with it and be there as an option just in case one felt so inclined...well come to find out, that night when it was bath time and Cate saw it for the first time, she immediately went to go sit on it and we thought she was going to do something then and there (we had no bag under it or anything). Well she didn't officially use it then, but a few nights later, sure enough, after dinner she signaled and said "poop" and we let her in there to get back on it, and next thing we know, she's done a diaper full of the dirty deed in the basin of the pottie!

Now by no means are we saying she's pottie trained, majority of the time still she fills up a diaper without saying a word or us even knowing until discovering it after, but this does show that she totally gets it...and maybe on the bright side, by her starting to do it some, hopefully it will speed up the learning process and motivation for Logan to follow suit...stay tuned on that front though.

So in honor of Cate's recent milestone I wanted to re-share a blog entry from almost exactly a year ago when it seemed this day may never come, or at least couldn't get here fast enough....


Date: April 16, 2011

The adventures with my daughter and her bowel movements continue...And along with it, another incident of poetic justice plays out in my case against doing the really "dirty" diapers. I have always had a knack of really "bringing it out" of them, but yesterday really takes the cake to date, or should I say "custard pie".

It all started as an innocent, mid-morning feeding on Saturday where I happened to have just Cate this go 'round. Well, after a relatively smooth feeding I sensed that she had a wet diaper that needed to be changed. So since we were headed to the mall soon to spend a rainy afternoon, I figured I'd go ahead and get the diaper, along with with a wardrobe change, out of the way so we could be fairly ready to go - at least with one of them.

Well after picking out an outfit and getting the changing essentials laid out on the table (new diaper and fresh wipe), I begin to undress her. For those not familiar (can't remember if I've mentioned this on here before), Cate loves to be changed, better yet, she loves to be naked. As much as she likes to throw her feet in the air normally, multiply that several times over when she is unencumbered by clothing or diapers. I firmly believe she would lay there contently most the day if we let her - at this stage there isn't much danger in it since she still hasn't shown a remote interest in rolling over or anything close.

Well as I take off her diaper I discover a surprise - a small, green turdlet. Ok, no problem, I've seen worse, I can easily handle this. So I use the old diaper, still partially on her, to grab the turdlet and some other "debris". Since I assumed that was the end of it I didn't bother reaching for my diaper changing essentials - Vicks vapor rub under the nostrils and my mask sprayed with cologne - big mistake! (although, with what was about to transpire I can say with certainty that my defenses wouldn't have made much difference).

So after I wipe her down and am about to slide the new diaper in place, I hear a quick release of air/gas and look down to find my daughter basically churning out a strand of olive green poop. Her anus basically became like a play-doh spaghetti factory, where I, "the baker", had a hard time keeping up (and putting up) with the level of output. At first I just started reaching for wipe after wipe, but those weren't thick enough or big enough. So then I reached for a burp cloth nearby, but by this point my reactive instincts were wearing off and my gag refluxes were starting to take over. Finding myself stuck between a proverbial rock and a hard place, I did what most men in this situation would do - I start calling to her mother to come relieve me, pronto! All along I had been giving Catherine a play-by-play, but by this point it had turned from a comical recount to one of desperation and panic.

But what tore me up the most with this whole ordeal was that with all the fuss I was making by turning away and yelling over my shoulder saying things like “Oh my god, so gross!” or “Get me out of here!”, I look down at Cate and the look on her face has gone from a wry smile of relief and amusement to a whimper of shame and embarrassment. It was as if she was looking back up at me now asking, "Daddy, what's wrong, am I being bad? Do you no longer find me adorable, am I disgusting you now? I can't help it." So once Catherine came to the relief, I let her take care our daughter's bottom half while I restored the top half of our little, uncontrollably pooping angel.

After Cate's confidence was restored I had to quickly vacate the room and let mom handle the rest of the cleanup duty. Not only did Catherine have to deal with the aftermath of my disaster, but Cate continued to crank it out, filling up another diaper and requiring countless more wipes. Little did we know that this was a sign of things to come with her for the rest of the afternoon...While at the mall, Cate had to be changed for this same reason not once but twice, and thus set a couple of milestones in the process - first use of the Koala Kare public changing stations and most number of times (5) going poop in a 24 hr period.

This actually isn't the first time she gone on me while on the changing table, but the other times she just wet herself - and the changing table, and her outfit, and the fresh diaper I had laid out. But the problem is, when she does this you don't really know it's happening until you feel the results. See the thing is, with her - how should I say - rather healthy amount of skin combined with the design of the female anatomy, when she relieves herself there are a lot of creases and channels for the urine to run down out of....therefore, when she goes on you, you never see a geyser like with him, you just slowly start to see and feel the results as it trickles out of all the aforementioned crevasses. On more than one occasion, while changing her I've gone to slide her diaper underneath her and felt some wetness, but since I didn't see anything that would lead me to think otherwise, I just thought it was sweat (especially when after waking her up from a nap)...However, the smell of urine finally hits me and I realize what all has just transpired.

Later, as I retold and relived the story to my mother, she asked what I would have done if Catherine was not there? Hmmm, good point, the thought of this happening hadn’t really occurred to me before. Obviously I hadn't experienced anything like this before, and not that I thought I wouldn't be faced with this reality of fatherhood, but it was so quick and surreal it started me a bit. What I told her at the time, is what I think really would be my best contingency plan - I probably would carry her (under her arms and away from my body) into the bathroom, dip her bottom half in the toilet and hit flush. It would basically be like giving her a reverse swirly (fyi, I swirly is when you push a drunk person already getting sick's head in the toilet and flush it).

Our adventure to the "Crazy Ranch", I mean "Lazy (5) Ranch"

Looking for a little change of scenery after being cooped up in the house fighting sickness for what seems like a month, combined with the fact that we have exhausted most of the local options recently like the trips to the mall, a tour de force of big box retailers, and one of my most recent favorites, just driving around the airport's general vicinity looking out for airplanes and trying to time them right to fly over us on take off or landing (partially due to the aviation museum being closed when we got there), we decided we absolutely HAD to get out of town with the kids at least for a night.

Well we were all set to venture to Asheville and had booked a stay on Hilton points in a  suite-style hotel with an indoor pool in so the twins can have their own room and they can get back to swimming (or around water really) for the first time in 4-5 months.  However other than that, we really had no clue what else we were going to do there, just knew it was time to get away and destroy a place that wasn't our own.  But as has been our luck and pattern recently, the twins both got sick and the whole trip went down the drain.   Although, at one point we were still tempted to leave anyway - the thinking being that things would be rough regardless of where we were, so we might as well be elsewhere...but we thought better of subjecting our hotel neighbors to 3 AM crying fits and coughing attacks.

Anyway, despite being tied to Charlotte now, we decided it didn't have to mean we were still homebound hermits, we still had to make something out of the weekend and find an excursion to get out of our germ infested house for a while.  So we decided to check out this safari of exotic, or let's call them random, out of place animals we had heard so much about called the Lazy 5 Ranch on the outskirts of Mooresville.   All we really knew from local hearsay going into it (and from there website) is that you show up, pay a fee at the gate and the drive your car around their property looking at mostly llamas, ostriches, and various derivatives of the bovine, deer, and goat families with the highlight being the separately fenced in area of giraffes and a then one lone rhino.  But what I totally did not realize, until arriving at the gate and being up-sold on a $3 bucket of pellets, was that you could actually feed the animals.  So after paying our $17 entry fee (good pricing strategy for the $3 up-sell right?) we basically were like, "Sure, keep the twenty, we'll take some, might be fun to feed a few."  

What famous last words...As we came to find out, and as you'll hear all about in elaborate detail, they have a much larger and wider population of animals than expected, all of which are now trained to come up to your car in search of free food...which, theoretically, would play right into part of our thinking in going there now that the twins were facing forward in their car seats....so we figured they should be able to see out enough to spot a few animals and get something out of it.  Plus, we were also curious to see if the twins connected the animals they saw on Baby DVD's to the animals they would now see before them.  Well, little did we know, "before them" literally meant "right before them", like 4-5 inches right in front of their face, sometimes with their heads inside the car windows.

From the get-go we quickly realized this wasn't just a drive, look, and point type of experience, it was a much more, let's say "interactive encounter" with the animals,  as evidenced by the picture below taken of the car in front of us just as we entered the gate.   Immediately after, we were spotted by these and other animals and we were right in the thick of it, marked by the herd as the next easy target.  With me driving and Catherine in the middle of the backseat between the twins, we got quite the proverbial "more than we bargained for" experience that thankfully didn't scar the kids, Catherine,  or our car for life...and one that we can now look back on and laugh, hard.  So here is how our three mile trek around the ranch unfolded....

Like I said, as soon as we were spotted pulling in, the animals started coming right up to the car.  We already had all the windows down so everybody could see better, but when the first animal, something in the elk/caribou family, promptly stuck his head right into Cate's window it kind of freaked us all out.  At first, when Logan saw it coming, he called out and pointed in excitement, but then when the thing poked its head into the window to the point it was close enough to lick his face (see pic), he started to call out in fear and panic.  Catherine quickly barked at me to roll the window or pull forward, but I didn't want to either freak this thing out by cranking the window up on him or piss him off by pulling off before he got what he wanted.  So I told Catherine to give it a handful of the feed...Reluctant at first, but realizing it might truly be the only way to get his big head out of our car, the next thing I know Catherine has her arm out the window and the big beast is now eating out of her hand!

This is some sort of Caribou type thing, rather tall, and rather long in the face, obviously...

After that first scare (and driving with the windows up for a bit), the excitement returned and we were able to lower the windows back down for the most part - except for when the ostriches came around, they still freaked us all out...it just felt like at any moment they could whip long their neck into the car and start poking away at us.  So as we winded our way through the ranch, Catherine played the role of scout on the lookout for (and getting an early read on) any advancing creatures, at which point she would then call out orders for raising or lowering windows to me in the driver's seat with my hand at the controls.  All the while, I'm also trying to navigate our way through and around a random collection of llamas, wildebeests, zebras, pigs, ostriches, and other various derivatives of the deer family.



Would you want to roll down your window for this?  Especially one right in front of your child's face...I think not!

Never did I think I would one day have something like the following conversation with my wife - especially taking place from some psychedelic safari ranch in Mooresville, NC while she was seated in the backseat between our twins - but I can't tell you how cool it is that I now have.

Catherine:  "Hold on, slow down...let's wait and see how the zebra responds to the car in front of us, then decide what to do...but put the windows up for now."

Me:  "Right, will do, but let me know if that aggressive emu comes back this way, I think he may have scratched the car."

Catherine:  "Quick, take the path to the left before those ostriches see us, there's a pack of deer and antelopes over there that look friendly."

Me:  "Ok, well hold on, I now got to wait on a few pigs and miniature goat looking things to get out of the way." 

Catherine:  "All right, coast clear on the right, you can roll Logan's down, that elk there looks rather tame...but keep Cate's up, those ostriches are still over there and have now been joined by a gnarly looking llama."

And so it went, over and over throughout our trek through the ranch....But what ended up happening over and over though is we'd be feeding and focusing on one side of the car and forget all about the other side (and by "forget" I mean forget the window's down).  Until…we would then start to hear the tone of one kid's exertions go from one of amazement to one of fear and panic and we'd turn and look and then, WHOA!, some creature has got almost his entire head inside the car and is now like the two inches from Cate or Logan’s face.  If you can recall the movie Jurassic Park, it reminded me of that one scene where the little girl is in the backseat of the Jeep Wrangler and next thing you know a Veloci-Raptor has stuck his head in and although she is starting to freak out, all she can manage to do is moan and softly squeal so as not to disturb it too much.  If I could have interpreted the yelps our kids would start making when this kept happening I would imagine it would have been something like, " Um, yeah, hey, HELLO!, look here now, we got a developing situation…I got a big-ass, heavy-breathing, actively drooling, hungry looking species invading my comfort zone here in a major way!  Quit looking at the animal on that side and let's start focusing on what we're going to do to appease this one or make it go away...!"

So we’d quickly turn our attention to that side, of course all the while forgetting to roll the other window back up…And so the cycle would continue for next 45 minutes or so as we bobbed and weaved our way through the ranch with Catherine and I teaming up pilot-navigator style to provide the best and safest up-close look at the animal kingdom.  Although, sometimes our method (when we remembered to keep the windows up) wasn't so popular as both Cate and Logan would call out for their windows to be lowered or protest whenever we would start putting theirs back up.

Probably more for their protection than ours, but the Giraffes were actually behind  a fence...and not coincidentley they were the but tthey were actually the most tame on the ranch.  Guess it that supports the notion that animals with access to free food will aggessively take the easy way out...Not something that's exactly something Darwin would sign off on, but we witnessed it first hand. 

As caged as they may be, if you have a 3+ year old and a sun roof, you can feed a giraffe! And that's pretty cool no matter where you are!

All in all, it was quite an adventure - just as we’d hoped it would be and then some!  I'd bet good money that we might be returning out there for a birthday party within the next three or four years…which they are all set up to accommodate with a party shelter, playgrounds, smaller-animal petting zoo, and tractor hayride-style rides around the property for large groups. 

Not two or three days after this though, Catherine catches some intestinal virus that she then passes to both the kids…which she became convinced that it was the result of some type of ecoli bacteria outbreak from feeding the animals by hand.  She continued to think this was the case until this article came out about an outbreak of a stomach virus in town.  (Click Here)

So once that myth was debunked, the only real lasting scar from the local safari adventure was the pellets of feed that stayed in our car for weeks after. 

And for the record, we still haven’t made it to Asheville yet…not to jinx it, but we are looking good to try again this weekend after going through one of them having crupe and another will a small form of pneumonia in the past couple weeks.

After the tour hanging out in the back of the car after we've taken tours changing each of them in there while the other walked around with one of us checking out the birds and goats.  And yes, that is a bulk package of the soft Viva paper towels, definitely multi-tasking on a trip to Mooresville and some random CostCo

Not much prettier than a Zebra, and got a lot closer to one than we ever expected...

Yes, multiple times there were multiple heads comig up for food...as with all of it, it was animal interaction overkill

Just another day in the life...

For those that have kids, you'll appreciate this recent texting exchange between Catherine and I on an otherwise casual Wednesday.  And those without kids, let this be a foreshadowing as to what to expect.  Just one of the many surreal conversations you'll have with the love of your lives, and thereby the mother or father of your kids one day...

And yes, all is well now and everything "came out ok"...

'Tis the Season and Happy New Year!

Ok, sticking to a New Year’s Resolution to update this blog more, and do more writing in general…Already a little tardy in getting a Christmas and New Year’s blog out there, but just doing it alone is progress. 

In a lot of ways, this was their first true Christmas…remember, last year they were mere morsels at less than two months old and while they still don’t get the whole baby Jesus or Santa Claus elements, they do really enjoy the lights, music, and gifts.  Also, in a lot of ways this Christmas and New Year's marks a true milestone for us as parents.  See with them being born the first of November, we rode the momentum and newness of them through Thanksgiving and Christmas last year, not to mention all the family around to help during both holidays.  So when all the festivities ended and all the family members returned home, Catherine and I came to the quick realization when 2011 hit that it was now all on us as parents, sink or swim. 

Crazy to say this, but this holiday season seemed even more meaningful than last year since we were able to start to see Christmas through their eyes…and on top of that, with Christmas as a backdrop and significant point of reference, more and more we’re starting to see babies grow up into little kids before our eyes.  Not sure if it's the Christmas spirit, extended amount time off to be around them, or a combination of it all, but I'm definitely noticing more now than ever the fact that we now have little people, not babies, we're raising.  One such moment that stands out, happened a one morning over Christmas when, as I was sitting at the base of the Christmas tree rearranging and replacing ornaments and lighting (again), Cate spotted me from across the room, walked over (albeit like a drunken sorority girl), stood looking up at the tree with her face all aglow from the lights, and simply reached up, took down an ornament and gave it to me…Now that is not something that I consider “my baby girl" doing, that’s more of a move “my little girl” would make.   

Speaking of them acting more like humans…As I mentioned before, Cate is off and walking now – completely lapping her brother who was crawling a full two months before she was.  I’m already wanting to take back everything I said about wanting them to go ahead and start walking…Not only do we need to anticipate whatever Cate might trip over, but also look ahead of where she’s going to see want she might face-plant into.  The other big problem we’re having with Cate’s walking adventures is her wanting to walk with things, particularly pointed objects, in her mouth.  She basically loves to pick up whatever peeks her interest, put it in her mouth, and then take it for a stroll around the house…which, for the chosen object usually involves several spills out onto the floor when she falls, then - while damp and dripping from drool - rolling around in dog hair and dust, and then re-insertion into the mouth (repeated over and over).  My comment before about her walking like a drunk is true…To find her equilibrium I presume, she walks with her stomach out, arms in the air, and sways from one side to the other with each step.  

Cate not only walking with a round wooden top in her mouth (knob side in mouth), but also an air pump in her hands that came with some other gift she obviously didn't care nearly as much about.

As for Logan, he will stand alone at times and occasionally take a few, let’s call them “overly enthusiastic”, steps forward, but when he really needs to get where he’s going he still resorts to his speed crawl technique.  I don’t blame him really, he sees his sister walking, but he also sees how long it takes her to get from point A to point B.  So like I said, when he sees the need for mobility, which primarily only comes from the desire to move from one item of entertainment to another (not to mention that in most of these instances he is racing his sister there), crawling is definitely the most effective option. 

Anyway, back to our “first true Christmas” as I’m calling it…So what as their favorite gift?  Hard to say, but my favorites of the ones they got are a remote control matchbox car and a giant bongo drum, which we'll get to in a minute.  But their favorite (and probably Catherine's least favorite due to the safety concerns - see video below) is the wooden slide I found on Craig's List for just $20.  They both, in their own ways, attack the slide with reckless abandon, so much so that Logan is so ready to go back down it that he tries to climb UP the slide immediately after, and never to any success (he literally hasn't made it up this way once), but yet he won't give it up and crawl around to the stairs.  Then Cate, who loves to take a seat, or more like a perch, in various high-profile spots, will just sit at the cusp of the slide like a Queen on her throne, kicking the advancing jester back down the hill...while at the same time laughing at the fact he can't reach her, and she's the only one that knows it.  

We really got lucky finding this thing...Based on my internet research, the only indoor wooden slides they make anymore are at least $400 or more.  The lone exception being one from Ikea, which usually is great source for us, but theirs' just didn't seem very safe (at least not for our kids' age).  The actual slide part was accessed from either side and didn't have any sort of hand rails on the platform - which just dropped off in the back (see pic).   So after striking out over and over, I happened to be searching Craig's List again one night and, while I had expanded to a 100 mile radius of Charlotte, this one miraculously turned up in south Charlotte near Carowinds for just $20!  I could hardly believe it, this is exactly what we'd been looking for all along, but unlike eBay I couldn't just locked it up right then and there...the only recourse is to just email the seller to see if it was still available and promise to buy it if so.  Well long story short, several long days went by waiting to hear back from them, but then sure if enough, the slide was still sitting in their garage and we went and got it the last weekend before Christmas.  

So anyway, back to the giant bongo, or better known by the search term it was finally found under on eBay, a "pow-wow drum"...Just searching for a bongo drum on eBay or google didn't work, it came back with a slew of the typical small double bongo drums and searches for any combination of "wide, large, floor bongo" didn't produced anything along these lines either.  But eventually I stumbled across one with the term "pow-wow drum" included the title, bingo!  Now I was well on my way to finding this gem, but I had no idea there was such a high-end market for them. Many of them out there are at least $300, but I found this guy in New Mexico that makes and sells them himself out of his own little SouthWestern boutique shop in Albuquerque...his email address literally ended in "@southwestgifts.com", which in of itself I was impressed with by just securing that email domain.  Nevertheless, we struck an offline deal for our ideal size and also so he didn't have to pay eBay fees.

When I dreamed up the idea of this bongo (or should I say pow-wow) drum as a Christmas gift, I felt like it worked so well on so many levels...and, as I sold the idea to Catherine, it met the tri-fecta of criteria we consider when adding another large toy to the mix: 

1. Tolerable toy - While by nature the drum is an audible toy, it is so in a much more pleasant and peaceful way compared to some other ear piercing, battery draining, annoyingly repetitive toys they have in their arsenal.
2. Parent interactive/entertainment toy - Icing on the cake when toy shopping, especially at this age, is when we find a that we actually enjoy playing along with them as compared to let's say an electronic, robotic cat that scurries around the floor blaring the same "Catch me, catch me…" song over, and over, and over.  On any given night, you can find a percussion ensemble that might rival what you’d see in the parking lot of Widespread Panic concert taking place in our living room between the bongo, moroccos, tambourine, and xylophone.  Better yet, there is one Baby Einstein video in particular ("World of Rhythm") that really strikes a chord, no pun intended, because we can all jam right along with it.
3. Acceptable appearance, borderline decor - In case you missed it in criteria #2 above, this bongo drum resides in our living room.  Well for those that know my wife, there isn't much, toy or not, that can pass the test to become a worthy fixture of the living room...but this did!  And for it to pass that test, it must not only be pre-approved by Catherine before purchase, but like anything found on eBay, it must live up to expectations to pass inspection upon arrival...and again, luckily this one did!  I'd even propose that Circa Interiors should import these from my guy and re-sale them at a 400-500% markup.  After all, it is made of real wood and real cowhide and I could totally see them accessorizing a mountain house with something like this as an end table and subsequent conversation piece.  I actually did bring this up to one of Circa's owners while sitting next to her at their Christmas party recently...she seemed somewhat interested, but for whatever reason hasn't bothered to follow back up for my seller's contact info. 

As for the other one of my favorite of their gifts, which, even more than the bongo, could be considered truly a gift to myself is the remote control matchbox car…Not sure if anyone’s noticed, but the advances in technology in the remote control vehicle industry have been remarkable.  Case and point, I stumbled across the r/c matchbox car while checking out (and trying to rationalize the need to buy) remote control helicopters at the kiosk at the mall.  Remote control helicopters have been the rage for a while, but they’ve finally figured out a way to control them rather than them just lifting off, hitting the ceiling fan, and crashing back down in a thousand pieces.  The guy at the mall was able to make it hover right in front of Logan in his stroller, send it back up, fly around the kiosk and land right back in front of him…problem was, we don’t’ have enough no room for all that and it was like $75.  So anyway, knowing that he had me on the hook, the guy showed me their remote control matchbox cars - which I was already somewhat in the market for something they could chase around on the hardwood floors - sold!  This thing is great, it really is the size of a matchbox car and has the speed and maneuverability to allude the twins as they try to chase it down all over the house…bottom line, it provides a good solid twenty minutes of entertainment. 

Anyway, not that gifts and toys define Christmas, but when you’re constantly looking for ways to entertain and occupy them, the ones that do really stand out.  Not much else to report from this holiday season, just a lot of time with family (especially those coming from far away), which is exactly as it should be...My big idea of giving Catherine tickets to Widespread Panic on New Year's Eve (with hotel room and overnight babysitting) didn't materialize, I chickened out after getting the vibe she wouldn't be all that into it. 

Hope everyone had a great holidays as well…here’s to a great 2012, hope to be back in touch with more frequency this year.